Mealtimes are an opportunity to build connections and make memories, but unfortunately, can also become a battleground from parents of young children as they attempt cajole their child into eating. Herea re some tips and hacks to help you make the most of these moments.
Family-style meals
Experts have found that when families sit down and eat meals together, there is less drama.
Exposes children to many flavors. Did you know it takes eight to fifteen exposures to a specific food before a child will start to like it? Add new flavors, textures and foods into a rotation for a few months so that your child has ample opportunity to acquire the taste for them! Children are also more likely to accept foods that they see their family consuming!
Learning by example. When children see you eating a variety of food, they are more likely to follow your example.
Responsibility. Family style meals are a great opportunity to give your child some responsibility and some “buy-in”! They can help set the table, they can help load the dishwasher, they can fill water cups, etc.
Limit mid-morning or mid-afternoon snacks
If your child has difficulty eating, says they’re not hungry, it’s time to look at what they have been eating between meals. It’s ideal for a child to wait at least two hours between a snack and a mealtime. Even liquids can fill up your child’s stomach, so it’s best to limit drinks during the hour before a meal. It’s important that we give our child the opportunity to actually feel hunger. Children who learn to identify hunger and fullness levels can regulate how much they eat, developing healthy habits when it comes to eating. Children who are hungry when they come to a meal are also more open to trying new foods!
Regular mealtimes
Children thrive on routine, and keeping mealtimes to regular scheduled times (for example, 8am, 12pm and 5pm) helps them regulate and set their expectations.
Don’t force them to clean their plate
Again, it’s important for a child to acquire an awareness of their hunger and fullness cues and follow them. When they are full, they should not be forced to continue to eat.
Offer milk towards the end of meals
If your child tends to fill up on milk instead of food, offer it towards the end of the meal or talk to your pediatrician about how much milk is right for your child. Your child’s stomach is about the size of their first, and a glass of milk (or any other non-water drink) may trigger the fullness sensation.
Avoid bribery as a reward and food withholding as a punishment.
Don’t bribe children with food. This is equally true when it comes to behavior (“I’ll buy you ice cream if you go to school without crying”) and trying new foods (“If you take a bite of the chicken, you can have your dessert”). When we do this, we lead our children with reward-based learning, which experts say cultivates an unhealthy relationship with food and unhealthy habits. Children may learn to use food to help them navigate emotional or physical challenges. Experts also say it can lead to an increase in cavities and unhealthy weight gain.
On the reverse side, do not withhold food as a punishment. Food is a necessity, not a luxury. There are other ways to respond to misbehavior, such as a “time in”, some quiet snuggles on the couch before we go back to the dinner table and try again, etc. Food withholding can also cause a child to develop an unhealthy relationship with food, give them anxiety,
Offer an enjoyable food at every meal
When offering new foods, or foods a child hasn’t acquired a taste for, be sure to include something you know they enjoy. For example, if they like green beans, you can offer it as a side with your tater tot hotdish. There’s no need to make different foods for your child than what you eat when you intentionally incorporate some familiar foods with new ones. Offer all the food groups at your meals.
On the reverse side, do not withhold food as a punishment. Food is a necessity, not a luxury. There are other ways to respond to misbehavior, such as a “time in”, some quiet snuggles on the couch before we go back to the dinner table and try again, etc. Food withholding can also cause a child to develop an unhealthy relationship with food, give them anxiety,
Include your child in meal planning and meal prep
Children love to be included and offered a choice! When they are involved in meal preparation, they are more likely to be interested in what is served and in trying it. They can be involved in menu planning, grocery shopping and even growing food in a backyard garden. They can also assist in cooking, even if it’s just pouring in a premeasured ingredient or stirring it all together.
Keep mealtimes to a developmentally appropriate length.
Most young children can sit for 15-20 minutes. If your child begins throwing food, or showing other signs of misbehavior, it is time to wrap up the meal.
Keep mealtimes distraction free
Avoid using screens to distract your child so you can feed them. When children are distracted by a screen they are less likely to follow their hunger and fullness cues. (Think of how much popcorn you might consume while watching a movie!) It also can create a screen-dependence, meaning they only eat if the screen is available. Research also shows that children who use screens during meals have an overall increased amount of junk food consumption.
Offer a variety of snacks
Prep cut fruits and veggies so that you can offer these as snacks for your child instead of defaulting to convenient processed food. Snack time as well as meals can be a time to introduce your child to new flavors and textures!
Know that food consumption can vary day to day
Your child may not eat the same amount of food every day. If you have concerns about how much your child is eating, talk to your child’s physician.
Understand and get help for food aversions
Be aware that while new flavors and textures can cause sensory issues for many children, there are some children with intense aversions which may require additional support from your child’s physician or a therapist. These aversions are not a choice or a sign of misbehavior but are a signal that your child needs understanding and support.
