Montessori Encourages Self Confidence
“The consciousness of knowing how to make oneself useful, how to help mankind in many ways, fills the soul with noble confidence.” Dr. Maria Montessori.
Within the Montessori environment, children are given independence and responsibility. They often enjoy performing what are traditionally “adult” tasks such as food prep, simple baking or cooking, cleaning, hosting a guest for a snack, and welcoming guests to their classroom. They become “mentors” to younger children who join the classroom. They learn to navigate challenges, problem-solve, self-correct, resolve conflict, exercise peace-making tools while the teacher offers support. Questions and exploration are encouraged rather than simply being provided “canned” answers and “fed” information.
Teachers often will sit with a child and ask them questions which help the child to process a situation or their own thoughts. The teacher conveys a message by her actions (and through the absence of actions) that, “You can do this! You are capable!”
When a child feels others view him as capable, he believes himself to be capable. This leads to self-confidence. It’s not a false, over inflated confidence that is dependent on their own perfection or others’ affirmation; instead, it stems from knowing their own value, from being able to contribute to a family or community, from accomplishment that offers value to oneself or to others, and from being able to learn from one’s own mistakes. This type of self-confidence will help a child succeed whatever the future may hold!
It’s important to understand that a child’s self-confidence is not built by praise; in fact, research shows that overpraising a child actually undermines their confidence. It makes children less likely to take risks, become highly sensitive to failure, and more easily give up, per Dr. Dweck of Stanford University
Montessori Respects the Child
The Montessori method is rooted in a deep respect for children as fully human. They are not “lesser” to adults in value or in terms of deserving respect.
Montessori respects the unique development and interests of the child, their bodily autonomy, their freedom to make choices; it offers the child the freedom to meet their physical needs (such as being able to move around the classroom when their bodies become restless), the freedom to work with materials an amount of time appropriate for them, whether it is minutes or hours.
During the Montessori morning work-cycle, children lead their own learning time. If a child is immersed in an activity, we do not have the right to step in and shut them down based on a preset schedule, just as we would not interrupt a colleague who is working on a project, telling them, “You’ve worked on it long enough today. Now it’s time for something else.”
The Montessori teacher does not shame a child, instead, allows a child to discover their own errors, or offering gentle guidance—not judgment–on their journey.
The Montessori teacher respects each child’s individuality. She does not push him to perform at a certain level or reach certain milestones, nor does she hold him back if he is making strides ahead. She follows the child.
In addition, the Montessori teacher gives intentional, daily, one-on-one attention to each child in their classroom. She presents lessons to the child based on their interests and development. This is another unspoken message to the child of their uniqueness and value.
As parents and caregivers, we must be careful to respect our children. If we’re honest, we often heedlessly interrupt, criticize, laugh, judge their motives, and overall just misunderstand our children. Instead, we need to pause and observe our children impartially and without preconceived ideas. This does not mean that we remove all boundaries (see more on this next week) – but it does mean that we are careful not to trample a child’s “delicate act of free choice…much as an elephant tramples the budding flower about to blossom in its path.” (Dr. Montessori)
Read more about the Montessori Advantage here.
